Welcome to the May Project

Posted: May 2, 2010 in Uncategorized

So, if you’re reading this, I am already dead.

No, okay, I just always wanted to say that. But, since the May Project is some kind of do-it-yourself personal rebirth flood-the-bridge-with-fluvon-particles thing, I’ll just claim it’s metaphoric.

Anyway, you’ve probably come here because you’re sick of hearing me bitch about April, and you’ve decided to do something about it. Good for you. You have just achieved 25 karma points! [You have 380 karma points remaining before your next level.] This blog (among other uses) will be the place for you to volunteer to muck about in my life in some kind of positive way.

The May Project is my effort to put aside the venomous corruption of The Cruelest Month and flail wildly around in the hopes of accidentally hitting on the secret to success. So I’m going to be doing weird personal inventory adjustments to rebuild around my innate ennui, angst, weltschmerz, indigestion, pathos, bathos, and what have you with the hopes of building some kind of highly evolved superactualized Douglass Barre, who will fight to save a world that fears and loathes him, or at least keeps sending him medical bills.

The first step is to make the process open source, hence the blog. You can enjoy the schadenfreude of my process, make snarky comments, sign up for obscure jobs that you fail to understand the point of but will make sense in the end, try to parse my terrible run-on sentences, and, as the Bard wrote, “much, much, more!”

So come by here every day. Yes. Every day. If I can check my Treasure Madness page every day, I can flakking well write something here. I don’t promise sense or coherence, but I do promise it will at least contain several of your earth letters, placed together in patterns that mostly make real words. Even if some of them are italicized German ones.

Tomorrow: The May Project’s first forays into getting me off my writing ass.

  1. Edward says:

    I am proud to be the first commenter on your May project.

    Now for my first comment–what the Hell happened in April? Yes, I saw your facebook posts, but I didn’t get it firsthand, so of course my first project is to have you call.

    That being said–start writing. I’m sure you have a topic but if all the things you’ve been thinking of writing are a distraction, do what I do–write something that has no purpose whatsoever. I suggest 500 words on a mystical dolphin and the greatest forgery artist ever known.

    OK, maybe you’d better give me a real task before I make up more of my own…

  2. Kasheri says:

    Yay for blogs! Blog more! Blog hard! Distract me from my work with your minutiae, otherwise I might have to prevent sexual harassment or some such thing.

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